As we enter Mars Retrograde in Gemini (October 30th - January 12th), I find myself wanting to slow down and slip under; shed, shift. I feel myself drawing inward with the season, my own leaves changing, falling. In the midst of this small death, I find that I do not feel afraid. Rather, I feel curious. Desiring of this new focus, this new way of being.
What does it mean, I wonder, to let ourselves wither and rot? We know we are promised rebirth — this is one of the great demonstrations Scorpio offers us — but how do we stay in this decay for a moment? How do we pull it apart and wade?
I feel like wading.
This retrograde is asking us to surrender to a great shift where certainty and safety are concerned. Eclipses coax us toward beyond-the-binary frameworks, invite us to seek a third avenue amidst polarities. As we navigate this transit, all the signs do well to ask: ‘what is the embodiment between practicing self-trust and understanding certainty as myth? How can I come to understand that chasing control is a form of self-betrayal? That the peace of certainty I seek will actually come from surrender?’
Retrogrades always make me turn time over in my hands. Time; a fickle entity that I can’t quite define but know I experience as existing wildly outside of what constitutes ‘capitalist time,’ as something fickle and freeing and erratic and ecstatic and moving in seven holy and perverse directions.
As a result, I am always trying to map my own internal rhythms. Trying to come into deeper understanding of time through astrology, through the elements, through the seasons, through my own erratic weather patterns. And there is a comfort there, in understanding myself outside of expectation tied to productivity (and that productivity having some bearing on my worth). When I simply think of myself as moving along a cosmic timeline handpicked and crafted by and for me, I feel a sense of momentary reprieve, of possibility. It feels like the antidote for the sense of control I delude myself into chasing — like a liberating salve — for it has no moral assignment, or preconceived expectation, rather it just prioritizes me at the forefront of my own life and asks me: what’s the next move?
It’s not always easy to embody this way of being, this timeline of mine, as ‘capitalist time’ forces me into shapes I resent. Still, there are always meaningful ways to resist.
A social media break during this retrograde, for example. An invitation to disengage from Instagram in order to redirect my focus.
Other invitations for the collective this RX include:
a self-study in how to work smarter not harder
a detangling of internalized narratives around self-worth
a shedding of expectations that do not align with your personal values/goals
a redefining of safety/security/abundance/purpose
a releasing of shame and unsupportive stories
a coming into deeper and more supportive relationship with your anger
a death of energy vampires (whether they be relationships, habits, patterns, actions, etc.,)
Looking at your own chart will help illuminate what areas of your life are to be most affected by this transit.
For me, responding to the call to divest what attention I give to Instagram and place it elsewhere feels like it allows more of the other invitations to unravel and unfold.
So off on hiatus I go. Despite corporations telling me I don’t exist if I’m not on a platform, that my business can’t survive without it, that I will ‘miss’ something.
I feel more interested in knowing what I'm missing by being on this platform currently. That is my resounding question: What am I missing? I want the answers to find me so I am carving out the space to be found, building the altar on which it can arrive.
All I know for now is that I feel pulled to answer this call — to wade through this ecliptic grief and intensity in order to parse and discern because clarity has been evading me for some time now. Like a retrograde, I feel the need to move backwards in order to move forward. Because amidst actions going awry and tempers flaring, it’s my opinion that this transit also offers an opportunity to reach clarity through shifting focus and embodying a sort of uncertain consistency.
MARS RX TAROT SPREAD
Where am I being called to divest/invest my attention?
How can I practice more consistency?
Where is my anger in excess and needing release?
Where is my anger in need of more expression?
How can I express this anger in supportive ways?
How can I soften?
Comrade card to carry through the retrograde
Despite taking some time off of Instagram, honeyclove remains open so do consider booking in for one of my offerings, or booking in for a RX reading to discuss how this transit will be affecting you personally. Finally, be sure to look out for my upcoming Scorpio Medicine workshop on unearthing shadow through elemental alchemy.
Whatever the weather, I am wishing you all moments of ease and reprieve and joy as we continually wade through our respective and collective cosmic landscapes. Lastly, remember to practice the art of pause – that’s going to be a helpful one to carry especially close until Mars stations direct in January. Take care of yourself this retrograde!
in cosmic solidarity,
tal
“When I simply think of myself as moving along a cosmic timeline handpicked and crafted by and for me, I feel a sense of momentary reprieve, of possibility. It feels like the antidote for the sense of control I delude myself into chasing — like a liberating salve — for it has no moral assignment, or preconceived expectation, rather it just prioritizes me at the forefront of my own life and asks me: what’s the next move? “ The wisdom and medicine in here...I feel like I need to paint this on my ceiling so it’s the first thing I see every morning. What’s the next move?